Friday, August 25, 2006
Girl's Night Out
I do love a good girl's night out. Tonight, I got to go with a group I haven't been out with before. All really sharp, really funny ladies. We had dinner and bowled. Granted, that doesn't sound exciting. And it wasn't car chase and high drama exciting. But it WAS a lot of fun. Cracking on each other, S's cute "toyota jump" that she did when she bowled a good frame, K's dancing (swear, we're buying that girl a pole....heck, I offered her a dollar), C's granny bowling, my gutterballs, having a few beers and just enjoying being together.
I have to say, I've been looking forward to this all week. And it definitely was what I needed after an odd and rough week. Tattled on at work , busy busy busy and full of idiocy.
I've also been thinking about committment this week. No, I'm not getting committed (am I?). I may have an opportunity to get some professional certifications. Good, but they'd probably lock me into a specific area of expertise. I've always floated around to whatever looked interesting at Big Faceless Corp (BFC) and it's kept me very busy and mostly happy for 11 years. To start getting certs in my current role would be getting a niche and would help me, no doubt. But do I WANT to be doing what I'm doing as a career? I like it. But I've also liked the other things I've done. Who knows, there might still be interesting things I could yet do. Most of my cohorts have certs, which does leave me as the odd duck out. I want to have the cred that goes with a professional certification.
Heck, I'm even thinking (again) about going to law school. It would take a LONG time, but in the end might be worth it. Of course, by the time I'd get out, who knows what would happen. I've known someone who has tried to focus on BFC's needs while she was finishing law school only to have BFC not care when she became an actual lawyer. Not a good example to encourage one to put forth the time or effort. And I'm a little intimidated about law school. I was never good at studying, the now 15 years ago I was in college. I'm thinking law school would require some serious buckling down and paying attention. Much easier to do when that's ALL you're doing and there's no way I could just take off an do that now.
So do I stay in a position to float off? Or stake out a spot in my current environment? Too much to ponder on a late Friday night.....
I have to say, I've been looking forward to this all week. And it definitely was what I needed after an odd and rough week. Tattled on at work , busy busy busy and full of idiocy.
I've also been thinking about committment this week. No, I'm not getting committed (am I?). I may have an opportunity to get some professional certifications. Good, but they'd probably lock me into a specific area of expertise. I've always floated around to whatever looked interesting at Big Faceless Corp (BFC) and it's kept me very busy and mostly happy for 11 years. To start getting certs in my current role would be getting a niche and would help me, no doubt. But do I WANT to be doing what I'm doing as a career? I like it. But I've also liked the other things I've done. Who knows, there might still be interesting things I could yet do. Most of my cohorts have certs, which does leave me as the odd duck out. I want to have the cred that goes with a professional certification.
Heck, I'm even thinking (again) about going to law school. It would take a LONG time, but in the end might be worth it. Of course, by the time I'd get out, who knows what would happen. I've known someone who has tried to focus on BFC's needs while she was finishing law school only to have BFC not care when she became an actual lawyer. Not a good example to encourage one to put forth the time or effort. And I'm a little intimidated about law school. I was never good at studying, the now 15 years ago I was in college. I'm thinking law school would require some serious buckling down and paying attention. Much easier to do when that's ALL you're doing and there's no way I could just take off an do that now.
So do I stay in a position to float off? Or stake out a spot in my current environment? Too much to ponder on a late Friday night.....
Saturday, August 19, 2006
A Good Arrangement
As a Westerner, I rarely think about arranged marriages. However, I have a friend who is from a culture where that is the norm and she's recently met her fiance. So I've been thinking....Where would EY be if her marriage had been arranged? My friend K's family arranged her marriage with her in a small state, small town in the US, her fiance in a large city in the US and family at home on the other side of the world. Would my fam in the northeast part of the state have branched out that far to find me a good man?
All relationships have their issues. Marrying the person of your choosing solely due to your mutual affinity is a recent idea in the human story. So is the idea that "if things don't work out, we can split". Abuse, infidelity, incompatibility can happen if you meet your spouse in a smoky bar or 3 months before the wedding your families have planned. But I find hope in K's situation. Her fiance was hoping for someone pretty and young. She certainly fits both criteria. He wants her to be a modern woman, is already encouraging of her desire to get an advanced degree and says she's exactly what he would have wanted. I got the story second hand, so I'm not 100% sure what she thinks of him. My basic impression from the friend who told me is that she's pleased. K keeps things pretty close to the vest, so it's unlikely that I'll know her exact thoughts. I do think it's very interesting.
I'm afraid, Dear Reader, that the tobacco worms from my last post were only the beginning. Yesterday I found one huge worm on two of my tomato plants. Ick. Ick. Ick. I can see naked stems they left from the living room or the kitchen. I'll check them today when I water. GAHHHH! No more!
All relationships have their issues. Marrying the person of your choosing solely due to your mutual affinity is a recent idea in the human story. So is the idea that "if things don't work out, we can split". Abuse, infidelity, incompatibility can happen if you meet your spouse in a smoky bar or 3 months before the wedding your families have planned. But I find hope in K's situation. Her fiance was hoping for someone pretty and young. She certainly fits both criteria. He wants her to be a modern woman, is already encouraging of her desire to get an advanced degree and says she's exactly what he would have wanted. I got the story second hand, so I'm not 100% sure what she thinks of him. My basic impression from the friend who told me is that she's pleased. K keeps things pretty close to the vest, so it's unlikely that I'll know her exact thoughts. I do think it's very interesting.
I'm afraid, Dear Reader, that the tobacco worms from my last post were only the beginning. Yesterday I found one huge worm on two of my tomato plants. Ick. Ick. Ick. I can see naked stems they left from the living room or the kitchen. I'll check them today when I water. GAHHHH! No more!
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Tobacco worms....gross
Mr. EY and I don't actually have much dirt here at the chez. Nor do we have a lot of space that gets full sun. So we "garden" on our deck as much as we can. Neither of us claim to be terribly good at it, but we usually get a handful of tomatoes, a few batches of pesto, chives and other herbs. Over the past few days, however, I've noticed some of my worst garden enemies: tobacco worms. I think we took over a dozen worms off the three plants yesterday and I took 5 off them today. Gross, gross gross. It seems that they "grow" into the barb on their tail. Took several small worms off today that had just as large a barb as the big worms.
Still can't find what's eating the mint from the Farm (Mr. EY's grandfather's farm, that would be). Poor mint went from a shady, moist ditchbank to a full sun, slightly dry deck. It hasn't been happy. It's been even less happy to be nibbled on. From my perspective, we do have 3 other mint plants, although I know why this mint means so much.
Got a few cherry tomatoes....I hate looking at the plant and seeing chewed off nubs of stems. Damn tobacco worms.
Still can't find what's eating the mint from the Farm (Mr. EY's grandfather's farm, that would be). Poor mint went from a shady, moist ditchbank to a full sun, slightly dry deck. It hasn't been happy. It's been even less happy to be nibbled on. From my perspective, we do have 3 other mint plants, although I know why this mint means so much.
Got a few cherry tomatoes....I hate looking at the plant and seeing chewed off nubs of stems. Damn tobacco worms.
Thursday, August 10, 2006
On the nature of friendship
Birthday dinner last weekend has me thinking about friendship. Small crowd this year. One usual was out of town and I'm actually quite happy she was. Her kiddo is fine, but not at an adult birthday party....especially not at mine. Another couple dropped out kinda last minute. They got slammed with having to put in a new HVAC unit in...that's not fun. But for those of us who remained, it was a lovely dinner. Was glad to be able to include someone we'd "exiled" because her guy has no social functionality. Fortunately, he's not "hers" anymore.
One former "regular" wasn't on the list. She and I have drifted apart and I've tried contacting her. A couple of emails, a phone call recently....and nothing. Not sure why. Not going to be a stalker, so I guess no more.
Friends aren't identical. You get from one person things you don't get from another. You have culture friends, foodie friends, music friends, sports friends. Old friends who maybe you wouldn't even be friends with if you met today. Seeing one of those in the next few weeks. She's pretty dang conservative and probably wouldn't have much patience with me if we met today. I doubt I'd put up with much of her, either.
So what do you do when you have an opening for a friend? "Wanted: Sports fan to discuss upcoming NFL season. Mentor-type a plus. Must know more stats/rules than I do, but tolerate that I'm more enthusiastic than knowledgeable. Baseball/basketball types need not apply." Or "Wanted: Hip, urbane chick. Must be good listener and not judgemental. Pluses include wine, good food and travel." Or "Wanted: Near soul-mate. Must be willing to consider lifetime platonic committment."
And what about "firing" a friend? The friend mentioned above...feel a little bad that I'm not making "more of an effort". But I can't keep a friendship going without the friend. And another soul I've taken to calling "Random Friend". I'll write and maybe I'll get 2 sentences back. Odd for one of the fastest typists I know...2 sentences would take 10 seconds. Then RF will show up on IM and lurk. Not say anything, just lurk. And I've tired of chasing. So RF is all but written off too. Which I also don't like. I don't like writing anyone off because if you were important enough for me to describe you as "friend", you're fairly important to me. But just like a garden needs weeds pulled, so does your life. Friends who take resources without giving are just like weeds. They may have been pretty at one time, but may need strong consideration now.
One former "regular" wasn't on the list. She and I have drifted apart and I've tried contacting her. A couple of emails, a phone call recently....and nothing. Not sure why. Not going to be a stalker, so I guess no more.
Friends aren't identical. You get from one person things you don't get from another. You have culture friends, foodie friends, music friends, sports friends. Old friends who maybe you wouldn't even be friends with if you met today. Seeing one of those in the next few weeks. She's pretty dang conservative and probably wouldn't have much patience with me if we met today. I doubt I'd put up with much of her, either.
So what do you do when you have an opening for a friend? "Wanted: Sports fan to discuss upcoming NFL season. Mentor-type a plus. Must know more stats/rules than I do, but tolerate that I'm more enthusiastic than knowledgeable. Baseball/basketball types need not apply." Or "Wanted: Hip, urbane chick. Must be good listener and not judgemental. Pluses include wine, good food and travel." Or "Wanted: Near soul-mate. Must be willing to consider lifetime platonic committment."
And what about "firing" a friend? The friend mentioned above...feel a little bad that I'm not making "more of an effort". But I can't keep a friendship going without the friend. And another soul I've taken to calling "Random Friend". I'll write and maybe I'll get 2 sentences back. Odd for one of the fastest typists I know...2 sentences would take 10 seconds. Then RF will show up on IM and lurk. Not say anything, just lurk. And I've tired of chasing. So RF is all but written off too. Which I also don't like. I don't like writing anyone off because if you were important enough for me to describe you as "friend", you're fairly important to me. But just like a garden needs weeds pulled, so does your life. Friends who take resources without giving are just like weeds. They may have been pretty at one time, but may need strong consideration now.
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Research, research
So I've been doing tons of research on The Boy and I's trip to Italy. Every day I'm visiting Frommer's Online, hitting Rick Steve's site, trying to find out more and more info to make sure our trip goes well. I figure I spend 5-10 hours a week on this little "project". I've gotten to the point where I wonder what I will do when we get back? What will I spend my time researching? I hope I'm not setting myself up for a disappointment on the actual trip.
I am very very very excited about going. I can think of little else. I have to make myself NOT "practice pack", plan each meal and activity, plan each second. I have a few more things to buy and I think that will happen tomorrow when I do some birthday shopping.
Birthday shopping.....yeah! Brunch at Satellite Cafe, Picasso exhibit at the Arkansas Arts Center, shopping!
I am very very very excited about going. I can think of little else. I have to make myself NOT "practice pack", plan each meal and activity, plan each second. I have a few more things to buy and I think that will happen tomorrow when I do some birthday shopping.
Birthday shopping.....yeah! Brunch at Satellite Cafe, Picasso exhibit at the Arkansas Arts Center, shopping!
