Monday, June 09, 2008
Don’t mess with the EY
(with apologies to Adam Sandler, but it was too fitting of a title to not rip off) I love sleep. I crave it, in fact. And when I’m asleep, all is right with the world. When that wonderful state is disturbed, however….
I’m not a “heavy” sleeper. I used to think I was. Turns out darkening a room to the point of it being a cave and shutting the door does wonders for helping you sleep.
The dog gets regularly irritated by wild creatures in the yard at night. I’m trying to learn to live with that. Bringing her in during the winter is a big plus for her, as the garage is typically nicer than outside. The summer, however is a different story. The garage is hot and nearly airless in the summer. I hesitate to do that, no matter how much she might think she wants in.
After living with me for years and years, you’d think Mr. EY would learn to NOT wake me up unless there’s some dire emergency. I can appreciate (a little) that he wants to be sweet and affectionate. Last week I nearly jumped out of bed when he kissed my shoulder as I was asleep. Last night the same thing happened and there are only 2 words to describe how I felt: fightin’ mad. Normally, I am a very tolerant, loving person. But not when you wake me up. When I woke up and it was still *really* dark, I was enraged. Literally, in.a.rage. Someone was speaking to me (speech before I'm ready is also an issue). I knew that this wouldn’t stop unless I responded and what I had in mind to say would be completely inappropriate. So I mumbled “I love you too, dear goodnight”. And when I say “mumbled”, I was so inarticulate that even I didn’t understand what came out of my mouth. I’m quite sure that wouldn’t have happened if I’d said something less nice. Apparently, from earlier episodes of this kind, I have the ability to clearly say “Shut the f**k up and leave me alone” while fast asleep. Mr. EY really doesn't deserve such abuse.
If you ever see me sleeping, Dear Reader and you have the urge to wake me up, think back on the
